Recently I read a devotional (Sarah Young's "Jesus Calling") that really caused me to stop and think. In that first paragraph it read "People usually associate victory with success: not falling or stumbling, not making mistakes. But those who are successful in their own strength tend to go their own way, forgetting about Me. It is through problems and failure, weakness and neediness that you learn to rely on Me." Then this statement was next: "True dependence is not simply asking me to bless what you have decided to do." OUCH. How many times do I do that?

I would venture to say that I do that daily. You know God I am going to do such and such would you please bless that. Then I am surprised when he does not. Then I feel like He is not with me. But it is me that is not with Him. I am trying to do things my way asking for His blessing. If I continue down that path it usually winds up not being very pretty. Would I not do better asking for Him to show me what to do? Of course, just like Moses, when He shows me something to do I want to start making excuses, I am not really suited to do, fill in the blank. For me that looks like: But God you know that I am codependent and a people pleaser and you want me to serve where? Don't you know that I am weak there? What you say You are strong when I am weak (2 Cor. 12:9-10)? Just how does that apply here? Huh? You want to help me grow? What! That will just make me worse! So, I end up trying to tell God how to do things. And we all know how well that works! NOT!

I want to do better this year. I want to rely on Him more and seek His will. Even if I am out of  my comfort zone or in a place where I need help I think He can make it work just look at Moses. Moses thought he was inadequate so God sent him help (Exodus 4:10-16). Is that not what Celebrate Recovery is about? Getting the help, accountability, to do the job God has called us to do? I have my sponsor and accountability team and they will make sure that I keep on track if I reach out when I need that help. In what area are you weak? Maybe you need to come and get help. Come Friday and start your journey to freedom from that hurt, habit or hang-up.